ACS: Dr. Bruce

Adam starts out by saying that his publicists Lynn and Alex were bugging him about doing a bit for MTV online. Adam wrote out the Top 5 things that will replace the internet, based on Prince's recent comments. One of the jokes had a reference to Methadone, but the suits at MTV wanted him to tweak it. Adam goes on a huge rant against the people that limit his creativity, and demands that people investigate the jokes that they don't understand.



Larry Miller steps in to help with the news; in this case, another Mel Gibson audio clip has been leaked. Larry jokes that Shakespeare's plays didn't have this much yelling. Adam also recalls that Dr. Drew said Mel is bipolar, and Teresa dives a little more into the psychology behind Mel's anger. It reminds Adam of how his mom and step-dad met at a primal scream encounter group, and he suggests there could be something cathartic about all the yelling.



The conversation turns to comments about the death penalty, and Adam says he's thrilled that both of Saddam Hussein's kids were killed by our military. Larry jokes that the people who deserve the death penalty are the people in the parking lot who don't wave and say thank you after you let them take a parking spot. It reminds Adam of his own parking lot woes, and he yells about people who sit in their cars without backing out of their spots. And speaking of cars, Larry and Adam play a few rounds of Hypothetical Road Trips.



Dr. Bruce arrives in his scrubs, and Adam says that he is both smarter, and a better doctor than Dr. Drew. Still, he teases Dr. Bruce for having 'good lenses, bad frames.' Teresa asks Dr. Bruce about the types of patients he usually sees, and Dr. Bruce says there are lots of kids with fevers and adults with Vicodin deficiencies. Adam asks for Dr. Bruce's take on his joke about Methadone, but Dr. Bruce doesn't seem to think it's a laughing matter. He says that 'addiction is a complex disorder,' but Adam says Vicodin was over-hyped for him and didn't meet his expectations.



The group takes a call from a listener who says he hasn't used shampoo in years and years, and Adam admits he hasn't either. Adam says the entire hair care industry is a 'multibillion dollar scam for rich whitey,' and proves it by pointing out there are no bald bums. Dr. Bruce points out that there are cultural practices to take into account, but Adam isn't hearing it. Nor does Adam want to hear about Dr. Bruce's second-hand/third-hand smoke study. Adam complains about bus fumes and leaf blowers, and says that people are hypocrites when it comes to showing concerns about what ends up in our lungs.



Dr. Bruce also brings up a story that children can't understand facial expressions of disgust until they turn five. Adam jokes that he doesn't interact with his children anyway, but then recalls a cute story about his daughter swimming in the pool. They talk more about the neuroses of the next generation of children, and Adam sarcastically asks how his generation managed to survive drinking tap water and eating peanut butter. Teresa brings the show to a close by asking Dr. Bruce about the new show he is going to have on the Ace Broadcasting Network. They still have not decided on a title, but the topics will revolve around science and health.



Keep your ears peeled for that upcoming Dr. Bruce program, and also be sure to visit http://www.larrymillerhumor.com

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