The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

"You see this? That's how you stretch!"

It was a magical night for both Canes Hoops and Canes Baseball, which means it's time for Dan to give a soliloquy on the entire history of the University of Miami's athletic program since the days of Ichabod Crane. Plus, Nick Wright is playing in a poker game against guys named Señor Tilt, The Magician, and Doc Holliday with money on the line for the Shipping Container, but not for Nacho Man or Stone Cold Steve Bloated, who are in Pompano. Or Doral. Or Sunrise. Or maybe Delray.

Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Roy, Jeremy, Mike, and Tony... plus Chris, Zas, and Domino on remote.

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"That's one of his catchphrases."

Greg and Dan want to show sympathy for an athlete. Dorks.

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"I shall not forgive you!"

Amin takes us through all of the biggest storylines from NBA All-Star Weekend, including the horrific Los Angeles traffic. He also delivers his Weekend Observations and duels with Zas over each of their respective Top 5 Leonardo DiCaprio movies.

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"Who made-a da salad?"

Noted lawyer extraordinaire Stephen A. Smith flirts with running for President. Then, as we try to pay tribute to Ron Magill's storied career properly, Dan insults Greg, but in an attempt to win him back, he allows Greg to roll through numbers 50 through 37 of his best catchphrases.

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"They're throwing words."

Hurtful words have been slung about: some at Adam Silver, some at Mike Ryan, some at Horizon League officials, some at Kansas State players, some by NC State Fans, and some... by Greg Cote himself.

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"They're yelling something that rhymes with muck!"

The Dolphins let go of Tyreek Hill, the Daytona 500 ended with fireworks (and ashes), the Marlins' owner said they're in it to "W.I.N." it, and the NBA All-Star game made a huge comeback, but the highlight of Dan's weekend was listening to UM basketball on the radio. Also, does anyone around here enjoy ANYTHING?

Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, and Tony.

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Seattle Public Works are still cleaning up the confetti. The off season is officially here and we're left with measuring up how Sam Darnold ranks among the best. Is he really the GEQBUS? We invite Sports Illustrated's resident football nerd, Matt Verderame, on the show to give us his list. It's a show for true football fans. Give a listen. And please remember to subscribe. Become a Football American!

AUDIO

Football America! is available wherever you listen to podcasts.

Leave us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/football-america/id1831757512

Follow us:

Dave Dameshek: https://x.com/dameshek

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Host: Dave Dameshek

Guests: Matt Verderame

Team: Gino Fuentes, Ethan Bedowsky

Director: Danny Benitez

Senior Producers: Gino Fuentes, Mike Fuentes

Executive Producer: Soup Campbell

Arizona Cardinals, Atlanta Falcons, Baltimore Ravens, Buffalo Bills, Carolina Panthers, Chicago Bears, Cincinnati Bengals, Cleveland Browns, Dallas Cowboys, Denver Broncos, Detroit Lions, Green Bay Packers, Houston Texans, Indianapolis Colts, Jacksonville Jaguars, Kansas City Chiefs, Las Vegas Raiders, Los Angeles Chargers, Los Angeles Rams, Miami Dolphins, Minnesota Vikings, New England Patriots, New Orleans Saints, New York Giants, New York Jets, Philadelphia Eagles, Pittsburgh Steelers, San Francisco 49ers, Seattle Seahawks, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Tennessee Titans, Washington Commanders

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Isaiah Stewart sends the NBA into full chaos with a bench-clearing fight that has everyone talking. Juju and Trysta break down the moment, the reactions, and who actually showed up when things got heated — including Duncan Robinson staying far away from the smoke. Then the show pivots to the wild Kuminga family room controversy, where accusations of taking too much food somehow becomes the league’s strangest off-court storyline.
Plus: a brutal Hartenstein double dribble moment you can’t unsee, and Jose Alvarado makes a debut with the Knicks that has fans buzzing. Drama, comedy, and pure NBA madness — this episode has everything.

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The 2026 Milan Winter Olympics are in full swing, and Roy is on vacation, so David and Roy are holding down the fort with Rose and Gabe to break down the action from Italy. The boys start by discussing the US women's great start to the tournament, including a 5-0 win over Canada, and break down the early stages of the men's tournament as well. Ethan has a stat of the day about some underutilized Canadian Panthers, and Rose has an update on the Olympics in Rosa En Un Minuto. In wins and fails, Dave and Ethan celebrate Team USA's women further, and Rose takes us into the world of novellas. Then, Ryan S. Clark of ESPN joins the show to discuss the impact of Laila Edwards on black hockey in the United States, and Macklin Celebrini's impact on Team Canada as a teenager, before picking who he believes will take home gold in both tournaments.

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"And there's a drive into deep left field..."

Did you know Dan calls athletes an 'economy' a lot? Well, Charlie sure does, and it leads Dan to dismiss him and Domonique from the show. Then, the Phillies cut Nick Castellanos, which gives us an excuse to relive one of the best/worst broadcast moments of all time. And Dan wonders aloud if it's time for us to appreciate Sam Darnold's humility.

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"Where's my clit clit?"

Greg Cote is in his love dungeon to dish out advice to listeners of the show who've called in with questions ahead of Valentine's Day. How do you spice things up in the bedroom? How do you get alone time? How do you manage three lovers? All the while, Dan makes his best effort to involve a bewildered Domonique Foxworth in the hour, but all he can do is picture Greg in nothing but a leather vest.

Disclaimer: Any and all advice delivered by Greg Cote does not represent the view of the Dan Le Batard Show. These are just the ramblings of an old man with a beer in his hand and should not be taken at face value.

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Normally, we'd have a quote to start this description, but there were so many incredible statements uttered by our reluctant love guru, Greg Cote, that we're just going to list them below:

"The word 'romance' begins with the letters 'R, E.' At the heart of the name 'Greg' are the letters 'R, E.'"

"I'm gonna be coming strong."

"Sex is too serious, let's have a little fun."

"Sincerity is overrated in the boudoir."

"Nobody finishes like me."

Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Chris, Jeremy, and Tony.

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"I don't give a damn about my first girlfriend. She can kiss my ass."

JuJu delivers his Thursday Thunder, updates The Polls, and has BOTH a Salute of the Day AND a Joker of the Day. Also, will Jeremy go 4-for-4 with his parody songs for show sponsors?

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"They f'ed up their twizzles."

Jessica is here to talk about the Winter Olympics and her search for a little bit of thigh. Plus, this James Harden thing may work out in Cleveland, huh?

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"They're always wondering why I love going to Whole Foods so much."

Comedian Ian Lara joins us as we somehow keep finding more Dominican New Yorkers who love the New York Knicks. Tony delivers his Refran Del Día as a rapid-fire quiz for Ian before Roy says something he literally NEVER has, as we discuss the Canadian Power Play unit.

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"That's an interesting question."

David chooses himself over eternal love.

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"It wasn't a question. It was an eloquent point."

The show seemingly had more of its crew watch the Heat vs. Pelicans game than any other Heat game this season, and Mike uses it as an opportunity to remind everyone that he is, was, and forever will be irrefutably right about everything.

Today's Cast: Dan, Chris, Jack Schitt, Mike, Roy, and Tony.

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Ted Danson is dangerously delightful... don't let him try to tell you otherwise.

Ted and Dan got together in Los Angeles back on June 3, 2024, and bonded over coming to terms with their insecurities late in life… could you imagine a world where the adored icon was not only shy, but thought he lost his funny, and needed Larry David to save him? That last part was about Ted, of course, not Dan. (Sorry, Dan). Ted also shares memories from his legendary time on “Cheers” and his magnetic friendship with the “whimsical” Woody Harrelson that culminated in their wonderful SiriusXM podcast, “Where Everybody Knows Your Name with Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson (Sometimes)”. Watch Ted Danson on the hit Netflix series, "A Man on the Inside", created by Mike Schur. Both seasons of "A Man on the Inside" are now streaming on Netflix.

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"AND YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT KAWHI LEONARD?!"

Jeremy is very frustrated as he tries to finish up his latest song, and I promise we'll get to it eventually. JuJu reveals that watching Traitors changed his life.

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"Anything is better than these terrible jokes I've written about Hitler."

Stand-up comedian Lucas Zelnick tells us why he's like a gambling addict when it comes to bombing and how he found out that calling a gay dude "gay" is not funny, but actually just a hate crime. Plus, we break down yet another all-time banger from Chris "Mad Dog" Russo on load management in the NBA, and Tony bets the castle.

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"The closest to a smoking gun..."

After an update to the pizza crust debate from yesterday, Pablo joins us to discuss his new bombshell reporting surrounding the Clippers, Kawhi Leonard, tampering, and even, potentially, a mention of this financial deal to the federal government. In the process, Tony and Mike undercut Jeremy to the point that he lashes out.

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"The rubber meets the road in a big way."

Nick Wright has stolen an idea from JuJu, but to his credit, it's a REALLY interesting idea. He also has thoughts on the futures of Victor Wembanyama, Drake Maye, and someone he was unfamiliar with before the Super Bowl: Bad Bunny.

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"God Bless America, God Bless Malachi Toney, and God Bless Uuuuuuudeeehhhhhh!"

We're living the jai life as we jaiperventilate over the Miami Hurricanes' win over the jaily ranked North Carolina Tar Heels. Greg also can't remember the jailight of his life at the fronton.

Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, Roy, and Tony.

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"🎶 Best way to get money 🎶"

JuJu is here wearing his throwback Marlins jacket, with some show feedback, corrections, and an update on The Polls. But first, Jeremy has another parody song for one of our show sponsors.

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"The F you think I was drafted to Detroit for?"

Tony finds the ugliest possible spot for his Top 5, the entire NBA fought each other last night, Bad Bunny reminds Dan why he's named Dan, and the crew learns that Gabe Vincent is indeed an Atlanta Hawk.

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"Dan, is your position now anti-football as opposed to pro-football?"

Chuck Klosterman joins us from in front of his electric fireplace to discuss his new book, "Football," and why the cultural monolith of the game may eventually be... doomed?

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"Gingers don't watch ginger porn."

Greg has so many memory lapses that Dan utters words he's never spoken before: 'Too much Greg.'

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"My wife always handles the wand."

After the Heat's loss to the Jazz, a team that is purposefully trying to lose to a point that Zas has threatened to send their coach to prison, we're talkin' boy bands, pizza crust, and the Marlins bringing back teal as p's and c's report to Spring Training.

Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Jonathan 'Phony Bologna' Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, Roy, and Tony.

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"I gotta think about that one."

JuJu still hasn't gotten over Dan's mistake from early in the show, and he's also here with games. Or to provide free "game." Or something like that.

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"I went to McDonald's yesterday."

It's Toilet Bowl Monday, and Amin is here to deliver his Weekend Observations, including racists in WWE, kickoff rules, and the Top 5 Things To Call His Dump This Morning. Plus, Jeremy returns at the end of the hour with his best effort at a parody song for Miller Lite's next Super Bowl commercials.

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"You have no whimsy!"

Can Sam Darnold have the greatest QB story ever if another guy was using his right arm to put pinto beans on the shelf? Can anyone on the show, other than Chris Cote, determine whether someone is a ginger? Does anyone enjoy a parody song as much as Jeremy?

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"Howdoyouknow?"

After an egregious error by Dan regarding Beyoncé, the Great Court-Storm Debate of 2026, and a Jordon Hudson shirt controversy, the Shipping Container sends Giannis Antetokounmpo and Will Hardy to jail.

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"¿Cómo se dice, 'Start the show?'"

Es hora de un análisis completo del Super Bowl y del increíble espectáculo de medio tiempo de Bad Bunny. Dan quedó impresionado por lo mala que era la línea ofensiva de los Patriots, Tony no podría estar más orgulloso de Bad Bunny, y Zaslow estaba más interesado en descubrir que Jessica Alba sigue estando guapísima.

Reparto de hoy: Dan, Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, Roy, and Tony.

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We made it! All the way to San Francisco. Host Dave Dameshek strolls down Lombard Street. Then travels down to media night in San Jose. Did ESPN anchors fall for his long running bit? (Coach, is this a must win game?) Of course they did. Then we chat with Seattle Seahawks great Matt Hasselbeck and Handsome Hank Hodgson on media row. Are we ready for the season to end? No. But we're going out in style on this episode of Football America!

(Photo by Vera Nieuwenhuis/via AP)

AUDIO

Football America! is available wherever you listen to podcasts.

Leave us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/football-america/id1831757512

Follow us:

Dave Dameshek: https://x.com/dameshek

Henry Hodgson: https://x.com/nflukhank

Host: Dave Dameshek

Guests: Henry Hodgson

Team: The Super Fuentes Brothers: Gino Fuentes, Mike Fuentes

Director: Danny Benitez

Senior Producers: Gino Fuentes, Mike Fuentes

Executive Producer: Soup Campbell

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The NHL is heading to Milan, but before it gets there, the gang is all here to discuss the fight involving Gavin McKenna outside a bar at Penn State this past weekend, which has the presumptive #1 overall pick possibly facing 20 years in prison. David and Roy recap their time at the Stadium Series in Tampa, and the gang dives into the Panthers Den after another brutal week that may have put the final nail in the coffin of the two-time defending Stanley Cup Champions. Ethan has a stat of the week on Sergei Bobrovsky's fall-off this season, and Rosa En Un Minuto features the Carolina Hurricanes. In wins and fails, Roy celebrates highlights in the sport; David celebrates the US women getting off to a great start in Milan; Ethan cheers on Gustav Forsling, whooping up on JJ Moser; and Thunderbug has stolen Rose's heart. Then, ESPN's Greg Wyshynski joins the crew to discuss the Artemi Panarin trade, break down the McKenna situation further, and tell us what his feelings are about Team USA heading into the Olympic Games.

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"I'm plumb sick in my balls."

Yammerin' Dave Dameshek is here to talk Super Bowl, but he gets distracted by his fury over an underwhelming uniform matchup that could have been spectacular. Then, after legendary Washington Post reporter Michael Wilbon joins us to discuss the paper's collapse under 'lightweight cream puff' Jeff Bezos and why he feels 'devastated' and 'pissed off at the world,' the crew discusses the size of their packages.

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"No, I don't wear two at a time. What am I, an asshole?"

Now that the Trade Deadline has passed, we can use our final two hours of the show before Super Bowl weekend to actually discuss the Super Bowl. Did you know Mike was a Day 1 Drake Maye stockholder? Plus, Ryen Russillo may have deleted his IG post, but Donald Trump sure hasn't taken down his racist post depicting the Obamas as apes. Mike and Dan lead a conversation on the normalization of Trump's racism as he deflects from the Epstein Files.

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"Yo, you see Ryen Russillo's Instagram story?"

The Florida Panthers and Tampa Bay Lightning have the most heated rivalry in the NHL. No, not THAT Heated Rivalry. And after a failed pursuit of Giannis Antetokounmpo, Dan, Mike, and Zas go through the list of stars the Heat couldn't land, and Jeremy is unhinged going scorched earth on...well... seemingly everyone else involved in this saga.

Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, and Roy.

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Billy Corben updates us on the false arrest and violation Joshua Epstein's First Amendment rights. Joshua and his attorney, Courtney Caprio, joins the show to talk about it. Plus, we give flowers to Miami news legend Eliot Rodriguez. Eliot comes on the show to talk about what he's doing now that he's retired.

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"I WANT THEM DO SOMETHING!"

*deep sigh*

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"Kenny Walker the Thirdeth."

After Mike dismisses the challenge Lindsey Vonn has ahead of her, JuJu joins Dan, Zas, and the Shipping Container to discuss why it's okay for him, as a Bills fan, to root for the Patriots and the Top 5 Halftime Shows That Deserve More Fanfare. Then, he and Trista chat with Haley Jones about her basketball career and beyond on this week's Good Follow.

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"Why is Dan judging Dap?"

Pablo Torre is here to share the harrowing story of Charles Flores, a wrongfully convicted football fan who is running out of time on death row. It is worth your time. Sign the petition to save Charles. But first, Dan tries to launch a truly dreadful bit that ends with Zaslow in the penalty box.

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"My name, somehow, is searchable because of that..."

Okay, there might be some missing context.

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"My stomach hurts!"

The crew cannot believe Dan's facetious monologue ripping the NBA media landscape may have actually influenced public opinion surrounding the Giannis Antetokoumpo trade packages, and in response, Dan calls Shaq sensitive again and comes close to killing Pat Riley.

Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, Roy, and Tony.

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"That's when I was like, oh, you know, football is the platform, but not my purpose. Let me go do this work. And that's when I found my purpose."

Brandon Marshall put up the numbers to be in the Pro Football Hall of Fame... but will he? Will he have to wait like Bill Belichick and Robert Kraft or never make it to Canton despite 12,000+ receiving yards and a record six 100 catch seasons in 13 years? Brandon puts Dan in the hot seat from the start after Dan describes Brandon as one of the most prolific wide receivers in the history of the NFL before getting into how he made a name for himself in the league despite all odds. Together, they explore Brandon's diagnosis of borderline personality disorder and his mental health journey from rock bottom to a place of stability and growth. Now, he's in the position to lead others in sports media as he signs a new production deal with Netflix.

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"I dig."

Amin and JuJu join Zas, Tony, Chris, and Jeremy to discuss all the latest news on the NBA Trade Deadline, including updates on James Harden, Jaren Jackson Jr., and Giannis Antetokounmpo. Well, it WAS all the latest news until Anthony Davis was traded, right as the show ended. Classic.

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"If you're gonna get me on, you're gonna be talking about the old days, for crying out loud!!!"

Chris 'Mad Dog' Russo joins us for a legendary hit as he refuses to speak about anything from the last decade. Then, Katie Nolan is here to chat about her Patriots getting back to the Super Bowl, the Westminster Dog Show, Catherine O'Hara's passing (with an appearance from Dan's Inner Monologue), and her popularity with the radio row guys.

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"YOU LOOKED INSANE!"

Dave Dameshek is having the time of his life at the Super Bowl, Dan is concerned about layoffs at the Washington Post, and Greg wants to be thanked for his top-tier cooking.

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"Too legit to quit."

Dan starts the hour by going scorched-earth with his 100% authentic take, written in his own words, that the NBA media is trying to force Giannis onto a team NOT named the Miami Heat because of jealousy over the Big 3 era. He's delirious with rage. It's a sight to behold. Also, Tony's Top 5 from Crandon Park has some bold Super Bowl predictions.

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"You guys hate when I say things are uniquely Miami..."

The crew set up at the start of yesterday's show that they were going to try to will Giannis Antetokounmpo to the Miami Heat, but since they forgot to do so, Dan starts the show with his fascination with frozen iguanas. Plus, James Harden's trade to the Cavaliers sends the show into a tizzy.

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