The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

"You thought you were talking to some hot girl, but it was definitely just a slob."

After another disaster practice for Tua Tagovailoa and his seeming inability to beat out Michael Penix for a starting job, Greg Cote says he is the most likely QB in his prime age to be out of the NFL in two years. Amin shares observations from last night's episode of Hard Knocks, and Pat McAfee explains television to all of us dummies out there, which leads us to revisit one of the great hard network outs of all time. Plus, Greg Cote updates his catchphrase list, and we have a shocking revelation involving Uncle Dick.

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"I won't let Kyra die a second time."

We are all so happy to see David Samson return to his regular Thursday spot. He joins us to discuss the pilgrimage he took to begin his healing process and what it was like to stay in hostels across Europe. He also weighs in on the Miami Marlins and their choice not to trade Sandy Alcantara, the NBA's response to the Kawhi Leonard investigation closing, the financial situation that Los Angeles Dodgers owner Mark Walter finds himself in after the sale of the Los Angeles Lakers, and whether or not Adam Silver is a good commissioner.

If you would like to contribute to The Kyra Fund in honor of David's daughter, you can donate at this link: https://fundraise.gbmresearch.org/campaign/812889/donate.

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"You're the worst Mr. Clean ever."

Zas is wearing an undershirt to work today. Mike Ryan actually slipped on a banana peel! Are you allowed to punch a 17-year-old in the face if they play sports? This show killed Amin's friendship with Urkel. The Marlins are cooked! Who is the closest player to Dennis Rodman in today's NBA? Zas can't tell whether a fan at AEW is encouraging or discouraging him from going to New Orleans with his kids for New Year's Eve. The World Jai-Alai League has new ownership! Should we sell the Cyclones?

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Brian Tyler Cohen is a pillar of the new political sphere. He's a proud target of the Trump administration, dubbed a White House "Media Offender," and has been changing the way Americans interact with progressive politics... and, no, he's not planning on running for office.

Brian explains how he cuts his unique space in politics... picking up where mainstream media drops the ball. He and Dan explore the cost of excellence and discuss the power of being nigh-addicted to the work. He's not all business, though... with Dan, Brian opens up for the first time about his childhood, including his love of wrestling and competition. Brian also delves into the grind of his acting career-- a pre-politics dream. You can listen, watch, and subscribe to the "No Lies" podcast and read Brian's latest book, "The Day After; How to Wield Power in a Post-Trump World."

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"Give me the last poll!"

After Tony and Jeremy introduce the world to Matt 'Tugboat' Wilkinson, JuJu comes out on fire with a game of Douche or No Douche, the Top 5 People Who Played Roles That JuJu Will NEVER Be Able To See As Any Other Character, and an update on crucial polls for Amin's theory about the theories.

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"Geze-o-pete!"

Jess is here to break down a Midwest phrase going viral, the opening for a new job in the Big 12, Song Sung Blue, celebrities getting scammed, and the NFL psyop that wasn't a psyop.

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"DARLENE?"

We have more information on the Kawhi Leonard scandal and the slant behind the recent reporting. Plus, Mark Walter's sale of the Lakers to Josh Kushner and Bob Iger has not only exposed the NBA's shaky owner finances, but also the future of the Dodgers and whether their massive payroll is built on lies.

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"So these are just two stories that don't relate?"

What's the coolest sports moment you've witnessed that was not about your team? Who's the character from TV you hated to watch the most? Are you in the middle of mock season? And why is Tony so happy? He has stories to tell about finding some cash and hearing some stray cats.

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"Should I go?"

Zaslow has an idea for plans with his wife this weekend, but he can't decide if he wants to pull the trigger and buy tickets. Then, if your wide receivers can block, do you automatically have a great culture? Let's ask Jeff Hafley. Amin introduces a new theory, we examine the worst press conference questions, Jeremy claims tonight is the biggest regular season start of Sandy Alcantara's career, and the AP Poll voter who picked Miami at No. 1, Javon Edmonds, joins the show.

Today's cast: Zaslow, Amin, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, and Tony.

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"Go play Call of Duty, kid."

Drew Brees' revelation an hour ago that he wanted to be a baseball player inspired Amin to make a Top 5 list and tell us how he tore the UCL in his thumb.

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"89 is such a hoax, dude."

Chris Cote is mad at gas stations, and it's not for the reason you think. He also once put green gas in his car because he was distracted. Amin is mad at dogs again and especially mad at Ethan's dog, who is named Percy, NOT Malachi. Plus, Hall of Fame quarterback Drew Brees joins the show to discuss the emotions of his enshrinement, how close he came to signing with the Miami Dolphins, and when the last time he went to the movies was.

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"Normally it's a donkey eating briars."

Is it acceptable to wear gear of your favorite team that celebrates them not winning a national championship? Tony has found the picture of himself at Universal with AJ Burnett; Greg Cote listens to his own podcast in his garage, which doubles as a mental man cave; and Greg Cote reviews the reviews of the Pat McAfee album. Plus, Stephen A. Smith is at it again after receiving a Thumbs Down Award from the National Association of Black Journalists, something not even Jason Whitlock has accomplished.

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"You know what happens to loose ends, right?"

The NBA has completed its investigation into Kawhi Leonard and the Los Angeles Clippers and found no link suggesting Steve Ballmer funneled money to his superstar. How has this happened? Is it time for Adam Silver to get control of the league? Is The Hartford Current a small local paper or an NWSL franchise? What the hell is going on with the sale of the Los Angeles Lakers?

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"Trade A.J. Burnett for a bat and a Band-Aid."

'Monday Chris' has arrived on a Tuesday, just off the Brightline after a weekend at EPCOT hanging out with A.J. Burnett, who he owes a DM. Speaking of the Marlins, they got hosed last night with a terrible foul ball call on a hit that should have tied the game. Jeremy is off today, but he tries to sneak in to react to it... because he's Jeremy. Greg is mad at the AP Poll voters, but despite thinking the defending National Champion Indiana shouldn't be any higher than #6, he ALSO thinks Miami should be no lower than #2 because they were the runner-up... to Indiana.

Today's cast: Zaslow, Amin, Roy, Chris, Mike, and Tony.

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"Alright. There you go... Okay."

The crew live-reacts to the debut of the first Preseason AP Poll for College Football, and Tony sends Jeremy his first carrier pigeon.

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"Buddy's got hair."

'The Shipping Contentor' is ready for Amin's Weekend Observations, the best new dinosaur movie in theaters today, the 4-month wait for Avengers: Doomsday, and the strange reaction to Inde Navarrette's casting in X-Men. Plus, Tony found a new app.

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"Everyone's got a podcast."

Amin and Jeremy finish up their Top 5 Always Sunny Episodes lists before Zaslow has Amin make the case for why Amar'e Stoudemire was a sure-fire Basketball Hall of Famer. How much should your influence on the game impact your HOF nomination? How about the era you played in? How 'bout if you're faking a voice? Plus, Tyrese Haliburton has a problem with the NBA schedule.

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"THAT'S WHERE WE ARE!"

Zaslow, Amin, and the Shipping Container discuss the tragic passing of Hayden Panettiere and the troubled lives of child stars. Then, what are things you don't know that should be in your wheelhouse? Plus, Tony has his Top 5 Dudes from the NFL Preseason, and Amin and Jeremy have dueling Top 5 Episodes of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

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"Miami spiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice."

Roy details his expensive meal from over the weekend that left him staring at the check, then at his wife, then back at the check, then back at his wife, and at the check again. Then, doesn't it feel great to watch your team's QB and not worry he's going to get injured on every single snap? Let's talk Malik Willis and Tua Tagovailoa. Also, the Marlins series in Philly? No? Oh, okay.

Today's cast: Zaslow, Amin, Roy, Jeremy, Mike, and Tony.

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Who will summit Mount Lombardi this season? Football America! breaks down the NFC and AFC North. Go Long’s Ty Dunne provides the national view, while Tim Benz (Pittsburgh Tribune-Review) dives deep on the Steelers. Dunne says the departure of Harbaugh and Tomlin allow their respective former teams to breathe and modernize. Benz breaks down why fans might be overly optimistic about the Steelers defense. Plus, are the Bengals are the most interesting team in the league this year? Or does Joe Burrow just need to retire and front an emo band?

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"Go ahead, say the next part."

It's time to toast Russell Westbrook, an ACC-based game of Mister Lister with Mike and Chris, Big Game or Not a Big Game, and some new couch shopping.

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"School is back...Jack."

Does it make any sense for you to go to college if Chris Cote and Jeremy Tache have ended up in the same place? What in the world happened to Cal Raleigh? Who had the worst drop-off of any QB? Plus, Pablo has the latest details after Part 14 of his series on Kawhi Leonard and the Clippers, including the paper trail with Daktronics. He also explains the questions surrounding Mark Walter, Abu Dhabi, and the $12 billion sale of the Los Angeles Lakers.

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"Look at these other asshole teams!!!!!"

Did baseball do its job and get us to football season? Did the Heat get screwed with their Emirates NBA Cup Grouping? Did the Panthers miss out on re-signing Bobby because of a formality? Plus, Miami Hurricanes basketball coach Jai Lucas stops by, to the delight of the Shipping Container, to share his thoughts on the state of the program, Florida turning into a hotbed in high school basketball, a court case that could help his team, and the future of the sport.

Today's cast: Zaslow, Your ol' pal Dave Dameshek, Roy, Amin, Chris, Jeremy, and Mike.

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For the first time, Billy Corben interviews a democratic socialist. Oliver Larkin is running in Florida US Congressional District 25 and joins us to talk about his candidacy. Friend of the show, Dr. Marvin Dunn, the founder of the Miami Center for Racial Justice, comes on the program to talk about a grant for the city of Overtown that was denied because Miami mayor Eileen Higgins wanted money for the construction of a walk bridge at Nu Stadium, the home of Inter Miami.

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After a disastrous game last week, we have all looked ourselves in the mirror and decided we need to get better. So we are going back to the basics: guys naming dudes. This week's game brings back an old favorite: Who He Play For—no messing around this time, just right to the good stuff. Plus, Joon Lee joins Jeremy to discuss the latest headlines around Major League Baseball as well as his Top 5 Baseball Movies list, which includes a scorching hot take.

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"Such a stupid ass age."

JuJu is here, and he is committing a major crime by wearing his Jayden Daniels LSU jersey. He reels off his Thursday Thunder picks, tells us whether the guy who sneezes in public or the brother playing music on a speaker in public is more annoying, and gives flowers to Damien Woody on an amazing run at ESPN.

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"Don't trust someone who gets the QP."

Amin continues to double, triple, and even quadruple down on his awful take that Chicago is overrated. What other cities does our crew believe are overrated? If Wendy's stopped selling chili, would there be a national revolt? Plus, a guy on TikTok has made it his life's work to throw a perfect game with Roy Oswalt on MVP Baseball 2005, and we are all the way in on it. Plus, Ramona Shelburne joins the show to discuss the details of the largest sale of a team in American sports history after the Los Angeles Lakers got sold for $12.5 billion.

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"'I was hearing' is kind of a weak qualifier."

The Miami Hurricanes are looking good in fall camp, and Mike Ryan would know because he's been out there. Zaslow's old friend and founder of the Freezing Cold Takes Twitter account, Fred Segal, joins the show and reveals that Zaslow has been the same person since he was eight years old. Russell Westbrook announced his retirement yesterday, and the crew discusses how he will be remembered and whether his legacy will improve over time.

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"Pre 9/11, travel was awesome."

Zaslow's childhood friend, Fred Segal, who runs the Freezing Cold Takes Twitter account, is joining us later, so we discuss which one of them is Matthew Tkachuk and which one is Jayson Tatum. Mark Walter flipped the Los Angeles Lakers for a $2.5 billion profit in just nine months; what does this say about the state of the NBA and the divide between the haves and have-nots in America? Jayden Daniels has sent a cease-and-desist letter to LSU after a freshman was given his number, 5. Zaslow explains why he thinks it is a bad look for the Washington Commanders' quarterback.

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"He's a portly fellow."

Jai-Alai is back, Jack! Mike and Chris have important updates on the Cyclones from last night's draft. Don't worry, Manu is back, and so are Iñaki and Unda, but how did we fill out the rest of our roster? Chris Cote is watching the Miami Dolphins through a very simple prism this year, and it's not off to a great start as Reuben Bain dominates training camp for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Amin has been watching Hard Knocks and tells us what he has found interesting about this season so far.

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Andrew Whitworth knows a thing or two about surviving football.

The former NFL tackle and Thursday Night Football analyst tells Dan how Nick Saban convinced him he was a tackle, why his pregame routine consisted of sitting in his underwear playing FreeCell, and why he still loves his former teammate and “Fitz & Whit” co-host Ryan Fitzpatrick after he sprinted away from a brawl. Whitworth also gets candid about the physical toll of playing into his 40s, the sacrifices football demands from his family, and his “nobody gets me off the ground” philosophy. Plus: Frasier, Taylor and Travis, and the anatomy of an offensive lineman trying to pee. The “Fitz & Whit” podcast returns on August 20th - watch and subscribe on YouTube and stream it on Amazon Prime before the Thursday Night Football pregame show.

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"If my music is that bad, tell me to get back into the lab."

JuJu is here to update the crew with some important omissions from his Top 10 Red Shirt-Wearers from yesterday's show. He also has a Top 5 for today's show, an update of The Polls, and a very depressing Stat of the Day.

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"College is supposed to be for being gross and grungy."

Zaslow asks Jessica for some advice, and Jess comes in with some strong takes on a new college interior designer, the new Primetime trailer, Stephanie White's time with the Indiana Fever, fake products on Amazon, and the team most likely to struggle from the Top 10 in College Football.

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"And now number 10!"

It seems like AEW has made Greg Cote references on more than one occasion, and it leads us to the actual reveal of his No. 10 and No. 9 on his Top 70 Catchphrase list. Plus, a nomination for Best Musical Performance by Roy, and Kyler Murray won the starting QB job in Minnesota over J.J. McCarthy.

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"I've heard it before, but I assumed it was Shakespeare or something."

Nick Wright, who just recently moved to New York nine years ago, is here to break down stories from across the sports world, but he's overtaken by his love for Greg Cote's Top 70 Catchphrases and the genius of the Little League Theory. Also, the Lakers have been sold yet again, Pat McAfee continued his run of staying away from politics by joining Donald Trump at the Patriot Games, and there's more Gianni Infantino news.

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"How high do you fly in seven seconds?"

Chris is out because his daughter is sick, but Tony is out for a much more plugged-in reason, no thanks to the fools at NASA. Plus, Zaslow and Mike are confused about why the Heat are waiting on Klay Thompson, Jeremy is all-in on the duo of Sandy Alcantara and Eury Perez, and even Greg doesn't believe in Malik Willis and the Miami Dolphins.

Today's cast: Zaslow, Greg, Roy, Jeremy, and Mike.

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"I think I hate the shirt."

JuJu has a Top 10 to respond to a day full of controversy surrounding Zaslow's shirt. He also delivers his show awards and updates the Polls.

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"You didn't wanna say, 'Let's transition?'"

The Browns QB battle is legitimately hilarious, and it has led Todd Monken to deliver some amazing quotes. Then, Greg and Jeremy were not in for yesterday's conversation about Enes Kanter Freedom, Royce White, Sophie Cunningham, trans athletes, and the WNBA, and they have thoughts. Plus, the Miami Heat are back in action on Christmas, and it has the entire crew fired up about the December 25 sports schedule.

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"If you're up for it..."

Greg Cote made an offer after a few beers several months ago, and now, unfortunately, he has to cash in. Then, Chris eloquently explains the difference between the White Pages and the Yellow Pages, the crew breaks down their first cars, and College Football heads toward a 96-team CFP.

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"The summer of John Leguizamo."

Adnan is here to show off his expertise in Major League Baseball and the movies, so Zas introduces him properly: as the host of Monday Night Hockey. Adnan helps us discuss who owns this summer at the theater, how the Dodgers' losing streak impacts the season, smoking and non-smoking restaurants, and Mike's Top 5 Movies of the Summer. Plus, Tony tries to pull off a physical feat that only Aaron Donald has previously achieved.

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"I went to the clothes store..."

Zas is here in his brand-new shirt, and he has a couple of cast members on board who weren't here yesterday. Greg has arrived with his typical far-away-from-the-mic energy, Jeremy has some feedback from yesterday's show, and the rest of the crew has thoughts on a new Miami Heat feud between current Heat forward Bobby Portis and former Heat guard Norman Powell. Plus, you know 'bout that Fourth Out Rule?

Today's cast: Zaslow, Greg Cote, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, and Tony.

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"Built the hell out of that damn world."

JuJu joins us and provides us with a damning stat about Enes Kanter and Royce White's attempts to play in the WNBA. He also directs our attention away from the nonsense surrounding the league towards what we should all be focusing on: the high-quality play from the superstars in the league, night in and night out. JuJu also shows us true love is everywhere and hands out some show awards.

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"He's A Space Cadet When It Comes To Basketball IQ And Attention To Detail."

Ric Flair Has Had Another Epic Twitter Moment This Weekend, And It Confirms What We Always Believed: There Is Only One Ric Flair. Amin Has His Weekend Observations, Chris Has Another Monday Chris Moment, And Hunter Pence Joins The Show To Discuss The Upcoming Field Of Dreams Game On Netflix, And Tell Us Whether Or Not He Has Seen That Movie.

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"Us Jews don't believe in that."

Yet more controversy has struck the WNBA after Enes Kanter and Royce White announced they are both declaring for the WNBA Draft. The gang breaks down the ridiculous nature of the latest controversy and why this league always has something going on around it. The gang honors the life of NBA legend Don Nelson, and Mike shares his list of Top 5 Barrel Chests out of respect. We also react to some great video of Ed Orgeron at his son's wedding.

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"You wanted to be in Buffalo?! That was a sentence?!"

Tony has his Top 5 storylines from this week around NFL training camps, including Aaron Donald's insane workout and continued injury concerns in San Francisco. The Buffalo Bills had a soft opening for their brand-new stadium this weekend, and it did not go according to plan. How do we still have obstructed views in 2026? Plus, Adam Vinatieri is a jokester, and Mike Ryan shares his Top 5 nice stadiums he's been to.

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"I make comments about these people."

Zaslow is back from his vacation and fighting off a cold, but that does not stop him from going after Uber and Uber Eats for lying. This may not surprise you, but Zaslow doesn't mix cereals, and Monday Chris wants us to watch a video from Miami Dolphins training camp. Plus, Zaslow and Mike weigh in on the University of Miami's search for an athletic director, and tell us why there is one candidate that rises above the rest.

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The one and only Mina Kimes drops by to build her ultimate roster of favorite head coaches, coordinators, quarterbacks, offensive lines, and defenses. Plus, she breaks down: AFC & NFC contenders on high alert to miss the playoffs; where the Dan Campbell era in Detroit will stand three years from now (spoiler: Mina’s still buying the hype). But is she too hard on Caleb Williams? And will Zach Charbonnet get the Hard Knocks fantasy bump? To wrap it up: Social Randy explains why our listeners desperately want Joe Burrow to pair with Ben Johnson... or Mike Shanahan... or maybe Sean McVay.

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"It's time for Mister Lister!"

Jeremy celebrates Robert Pattinson's ascension, which leads the crew into a conversation about the biggest celebrity of the last 5 decades. Then, Chris pitches a new version of a survivor pool. Plus, it's time to get into playing shape: Mike vs. Jeremy and Mike vs. Roy in one of Dave's classic trivial pursuits.

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"Busting makes me feel good."

Haynes King will always be a gamer. Always. Plus, at the top of the 10 o'clock hour, Pablo joins the show to share his latest exposé of the Kawhi Leonard scandal involving the Clippers, Salary Cap circumvention, and now, a new business: Daktronics. He explains the origin of his story, how the details tie into the rest of this saga, and the questions fans and the media alike should be asking.

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"Splay that weiner out real nice..."

Dave Dameshek is driving the ship, and he's gotten off to a cup-full-of-sausage start. What's the best breakfast meat? Then, why do we pay any attention to preseason polls in College Football? Should we have our own Top 25 Preseason Producers Poll for the NFL? And what's the worst number for a QB?

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