The 7 Phases of Divorcing a Narcissist (What No One Warns You About)

• You're separating or divorcing someone with narcissistic traits

• Your ex keeps changing tactics and you feel like you're always one step behind

• You've experienced love-bombing, guilt, threats, or emotional manipulation

• Your ex is running smear campaigns or trying to control the narrative

• Money, disclosure, or property settlement keeps getting delayed

• Your children are being pulled into adult conflict

• Your ex is using the legal system as a weapon

• You feel like the abuse didn't end after separation

• You want to know what's coming next before it happens

This episode is for education only and not legal or psychological advice. Please seek your own independent legal support based on your circumstances.

Divorcing a narcissist isn't just difficult it's predictable. In this episode, Mum and I walk you through the seven phases most people experience when separating from someone with narcissistic traits, based on what we see every single day in real cases.

We talk about how tactics have evolved, why the mask eventually drops, and how emotional manipulation turns into smear campaigns, financial control, legal abuse, and ongoing chaos even after court ends.

We're not diagnosing anyone, and this isn't about labelling. It's about pattern recognition. Once you understand the phases, you can stop blaming yourself, protect your boundaries, and make informed decisions instead of reacting in survival mode.

📌 This episode contains discussions around family violence. Support numbers are listed below.

00:00 Divorcing a Narcissist – What to Expect & Why It's Different

01:50 Narcissistic Traits in Divorce and Separation

02:34 Phase One: Love Bombing, Guilt Tripping & Emotional Manipulation

03:50 How Narcissists Use Legal Delays and Manipulation

07:51 Phase Two: Control Tactics, Hoovering & Threats

11:57 Setting Boundaries When Divorcing a Narcissist

14:22 Phase Three: Smear Campaigns & Image Management Tactics

16:16 How to Protect Yourself Before Things Escalate

18:23 The Financial Motives Behind 50/50 Parenting Claims

18:36 Unethical Family Court Reports & Image Control

19:54 Social Media Smear Campaigns and Reputation Control

22:18 Financial Abuse Through Control and Delay Tactics

26:18 Using Children as Pawns in High-Conflict Divorce

28:47 Manipulating the Legal System After Separation

30:48 Post-Separation Abuse: Chaos and Control After Court

32:42 Final Support, Safety Planning & What to Do Next

Support Services (Australia)

• 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14

• Episodes Mentioned

• The Narcissist Playbook

• 10 Boundaries You Must Set in Divorce https://open.spotify.com/episode/0ecDTxw4rTc3zXBkcjuYpA?si=0tfzIRFrTuWSfrywenG4lA

• What About Their Belongings? https://open.spotify.com/episode/2bPd3wWLQh3pzQmL2KCR0v?si=ABBaDvMVRgqnkvfXHJh66A

• Protecting Your Role as Primary Carer https://open.spotify.com/episode/6oZAEkj18NEcUfJPXP0FOT?si=PR8-zKyXRru7oVeW2Allew

• Legal & Financial Abuse After Separation

https://open.spotify.com/episode/1V23F0O5yhQt9NFLPOu6uJ?si=ZkP-KquxREeTCyQPk8I-TA What If Your Ex Lies in Court?

• https://open.spotify.com/episode/5SdkXhj3vC2tfO3gDdkM6y?si=sQjxVlNSTm2wnaHQdWxdlA

• Safety Planning After Separation

• https://open.spotify.com/episode/5hMmTS99LaeUWOXSxKMx1D?si=Y98mBgDoTiK1LQud-tr9BQ

• DARVO in Divorce https://open.spotify.com/episode/0JyfH5fCoqrUoxeDj6jCtu?si=mDoKfN3fQWONekpLUQflXg

• False allegations of Parental Alienation https://open.spotify.com/episode/0l9L5SDovV515EU4H5gpIf?si=5z2-pibvRKavyrPkMeuMIw

Resources

• "Before You Go" Checklist – thedivorcecourse.com.au

• 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732

• Lifeline – 13 11 14

• RSPCA Safe Beds for Pets (state dependent)

This episode is for education only and not legal advice. Please seek your own independent legal support based on your circumstances.

If this episode helped you, please share it — you never know who else needs to hear this before they get blindsided.