"Follow the stream of Love you already know, no matter how small it is."

It's my ex-hubby's year to Love on the kids for the holidays, so after a tearful goodbye yesterday, I wanted to share how I still managed to lean into Love (this will be my first Christmas morning without them), and will continue to as I navigate this life thing.   

"Follow the stream of Love you already know, no matter how small it is." - St. Francis of Assisi

"As a drop of water poured into wine loses itself, and takes the color and savor of wine; or as a bar of iron, heated red-hot, becomes like fire itself, forgetting its own nature; or as the air, radiant with sun-beams, seems not so much to be illuminated as to be light itself; so in the saints all human affections melt away by some unspeakable transmutation into the will of God.  For how could God be all in all, if anything merely human remained in man?  The substance will endure, but in another beauty, a higher power, a greater glory."
― Bernard of Clairvaux, On Loving God

"Real enlightenment will annihilate you and subsequently turn you into God. The waters of surrender and the fire of awareness will merge, dissolving the ego into thin air and allowing the one unborn Consciousness, hiding behind “I,” to shine through you, as you.

Just because you were born, don’t assume that you are truly alive. Being born is what gives you the freedom to actually be alive—and euphorically dance and sing with the whole of creation—if you choose to."
-SantataGamana. Turiya - The God State: Beyond Kundalini, Kriya Yoga & all Spirituality (Real Yoga Book 5) (p. 18). Real Yoga 

Today's Practice:
Staying in touch with Love during the ups and downs of life is the purpose of this life.  Surrendering to (relaxing into) feeling this Love in every moment, even the sad ones (when the body is tense, stomach clenched, and breath shallow), while challenging, changes not only the quality of that moment but the future-nows as well. 

Permission slips I used yesterday included remembering that the Christ is born within us everyday, not just once a year. Every day is Christmas.  Everyday is a celebration once you remember this Love.  And then taking it a step further by seeing through days altogether.  Only Love is here and sometimes we call it Monday or Saturday, and every now and then, Christmas.  And that no matter where I appear to be, or where my kiddos appear to be, we are together in Love, always. That's where my Grandma is, too... and your departed loved ones, and God... One in this Place.  This Love.  

Finally, and obviously, taking a trip to Assisi, Italy is a permission slip to feel Love, too.  But I must highlight that this opportunity to go on silent retreat only unfolded in the last two weeks, the way the rest of the Go(o)d events in this life seem to happen-- through relaxation, not tension, through abiding in the calm before, during and after the storms of life.  I stay convinced that Life is dope, and it always proves  itself to be just that.  I'll be on silent retreat in St. Francis' (and St. Clare’s) home town, but not absent from here! New episodes will continue to go live erry'day, while I pray :)

I Love you, 
Nik 

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