The Art of Manliness

Several years ago we published an article about famous "mastermind groups" from history. One of them was a group of British scholars called The Inklings. From this group came two of the 20th century's most famous English writers: C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien. After I first learned about the Inklings, I wanted to dig deeper into this male-only writer's club to find out more about each individual and the group's effect on their respective lives and careers. In The Fellowship: The Literary Lives of the Inklings, husband and wife team Philip and Carol Zaleski profile the four most prominent members of the Inklings (Lewis and Tolkien, along with Owen Barfield and Charles Williams), how the group started, and how its dynamics changed over its 30-year history.
In today's podcast, I talk to Philip and Carol about the history of the Inklings and what we can learn from them about forming our own mastermind groups.

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I'm a barbell guy. That's what I do for my strength training. But I know a lot of listeners love bodyweight exercises. You can do it anywhere, it saves you money, and it's incredibly functional. So there are a lot of benefits, but I've never really been able to find a good bodyweight program. But I came across a book called Homemade Muscle by Anthony Arvanitakis which builds periodization into bodyweight programming. He's got an amazing story, which we'll talk about, as well as the nitty-gritty of bodyweights.

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In the past 20 years, there's been all kinds of research about declining community life in America. Participation in PTAs, civic clubs, even bowling leagues is on the decline, and Americans don't really know who their neighbors are anymore. My guest today argues that what we're seeing is a transformation in how people organize themselves socially. Why people are doing this, and how it affects our society, is what author Marc Dunkelman ("The Vanishing Neighbor") and I talk about.

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Are you an entrepreneur or a manager, and you feel like every day at work you're just putting out fires? Or in your personal life, you go home and it's just crisis after crisis that needs fixing. And so you try to manage this trouble-shooting by getting more efficient at putting out those fires. What if the real answer though is not greater efficiency, but instead a way of looking at your life as a series of systems? That's what today's guest, Sam Carpenter, argues. On the show we talk about his book, Work the System, and how everyone can benefit from systemizing their work and life.

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Since I started the site in 2008, I've read a lot of books about men's style. And one of the most fun, engaging, and witty books on the topic I've come across is called Men's Style: A Thinking Man's Guide to Dress. It's by a columnist and novelist named Russell Smith. Today on the show we discuss the philosophy of style, the history of it, why the great men of history were concerned about how they look, and why we should care today. We also get into practical tips on suits, shirts, shoes, etc.

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In the past forty years we've seen dramatic changes in the way people date and marry. From the hook-up culture on college campuses to young adults putting off marriage longer and longer, a lot of explanations have been offered that focus on changing values in our country. But my guest today on the podcast argues that perhaps changing demographics has more to do with changing mating patterns in the West. His name is Jon Birger and he's the author of the book Date-onoics: How Dating Became a Lopsided Numbers Game. Today on the podcast Jon and I discuss how changing sex ratios influences everything from delaying marriage to the hook-up culture.

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You've probably seen on TV or online the Highland Games: guys in kilts throwing giant logs, tossing hammers over their heads, etc. It's a fascinating strength competition, and one I've long wanted to learn more about and get in touch with my Scottish roots. Today on the show I'm talking with a Highland Games competitor named Matt Vincent. We talk what goes into training, how to get started with events if you're interested, a workout program called The Hate, and much more.

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All of us are going to die someday. And we're all going to have loved ones who will die from disease or old age. In fact, some of you listening right now may be dying yourself or watching a loved one die.
But the thing is most modern Westerners aren't prepared for the actual event of dying because we've done such a great job cordoning it off from the rest of life. If you're a young person, you've likely never seen a person die because we typically die in hospitals.
Consequently, there are lot of myths and misconceptions about the dying process. Also a lot of fear- both for the person dying and those watching them die.
But my guest today has made it her career educating people about the dying process and showing people that it's more than a medical event. Her name is Barbara Karnes. She's a hospice nurse and the author of several books about dying and how to bring it back to the natural part of life that it is.
Today on the podcast Barbara and I get into what to expect when you're in the twilight of life and how you can make the experience less scary and even more meaningful.

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One of my favorite writers online is Steve Kamb, who operates a fitness website called Nerd Fitness. What I love about Steve is that he's made fitness accessible and fun to people who otherwise wouldn't be interested in physical fitness or strength training. He takes inspiration from video games, pop culture, comic books, etc. and creates workouts and life lessons. He just wrote a book called Level Up Your Life, and on the show we talk about how video games can be a template for leading a better and more fulfilling life.

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We've probably all seen some sort of scam or fraud in the news (Bernie Madoff), or even in our email inbox (that Nigerian prince). We tend to think we're way too smart to fall for those cons and tell ourselves "That could never happen to me." Well our guest today wrote a book that says that might not be the case. Her name is Maria Konnikova and her book is called The Confidence Game: Why We Fall For It Every Time. She looks at the psychology of scams and what scam artists do to get inside our brains. And in this episode, we talk about that, as well as how to scam-proof your life.

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Have you ever spent an entire day at work feeling really busy, checking emails, reading your news feed -- and at the end of the day you realize, "Man, I really wasn't all that productive." You felt busy but your brain was fuzzy and didn't end up doing all that much.
If that sounds familiar, today's show is for you. My guest, Cal Newport, has a new book out called Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World. I'm not joking when I say this has been a life-changing book for me. We talk about the principles of deep work, plus the nuts and bolts of being more focused with your day.

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Sports is a multi-billion dollar industry. Hundreds of millions of people consumer this entertainment either live or on TV, and athletes are paid millions for what they do. But all this started with the super exciting sport of competitive walking. You read that right.
My guest today is Matthew Algeo, and he's written a book called Pedestrianism: When Watching People Walk Was America's Favorite Spectator Sport. It's a fascinating bit of lost American history, and on today's show, Algeo and I discuss competitive walking, and its larger implications and influences on sports today.

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One of my favorite books I read last year is called Self & Soul: A Defense of Ideals by a professor named Mark Edmundson. He makes the argument that in the West, our commitment to ideals (the Soul) is fading, and we're becoming a culture of the Self -- desiring comfort, safety, and materialism over the ancient ideals of courage, compassion, and contemplation. In today's podcast we discuss ancient ideals, the cultural history of the decline of ideals, and how we can revive Soul in the modern wold.

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One of the biggest sources of contention in marriages is money. The reason for that is because people come into marriage with very different ideas about how money should be managed, saved, spent, etc. My guests today, Derek and Carrie Olsen, are a couple who had a big financial catastrophe at the beginning of their relationship. On today's show, we talk about their book One Bed, One Bank Account.

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I talk to media and image consultant Frances Cole Jones about how to put your best foot forward in your personal life and business. Lots of great actionable steps to help you make a great first impression.

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If you've read Band of Brothers or watched the miniseries, you're familiar with the name Dick Winters. He was part of that famous airborne division which was so crucial in so many pieces of WWII. We've written a lot about the Band of Brothers here on AoM, and each one had something unique that set them apart from the others. What set Dick Winters apart was his leadership abilities. Our guest on today's podcast, Colonel Cole Kingseed, was a good friend of Major Winters in his later years, and even helped him write his memoirs. After Winters died, Kingseed wrote his own book called Conversations With Dick Winters, which we talk about on the show.

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We've probably all heard of Emily Post, who wrote an etiquette book back in the 1920s that became world-famous. Her work of encouraging good manners and etiquette continues today with her family at the Emily Post Institute. Today on the show I have Emily Post's great-great-grandson Daniel Post Senning to discuss etiquette for men, as well as digital etiquette in this world of smartphones, emails, etc.

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A while back I got an email from an AoM reader named Jareem Gunter. He does a lot of mentoring for at-risk youth in Oakland, CA. He's released a book called The Man Book, which I contributed to, and is full of skills for young men to succeed in the world. On this podcast, we talk about that book, as well as the topic of mentoring, and why it's so important not only for young men, but older men too.

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For the past year I've been doing a lot of research on the benefits of face-to-face conversation, and looking for more ways to incorporate it into my own life. One of the books that really helped is called The Village Effect by Susan Pinker. She highlights not only psychological, but physiological benefits of face-to-face contact. It makes us healthier, happier, and smarter, and we talk about how to get more of it in your life.

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Last year I got an email out of the blue from a guy named Tod Moore inviting me to a weekend of doing various man skills: shooting guns, butchering animals, doing obstacle races. Of course, I was in. The event was called the Vanguard, which was put on by a gym in Austin, Texas called Atomic Athlete. Their goal is overall strength and conditioning, and on today's show, I talk to the two founders of the gym about lifting, conditioning, the psychology of strength, and more.

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There's been a transformation in the West about what it means to be a grown up. There used to be scripts to follow, and markers to meet which would mean you're an adult. But those scripts have been thrown out the window, and now it's confusing for young people to know if they've entered adulthood. My guest today takes us on a whirlwind tour of modern adulthood, going back to the 1500s. His name is Steven Mintz, and he's a professor of history at the University of Texas.

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Winter is coming. If you like to be in the outdoors, one thing you need to start thinking about is what would happen if you were stuck in the wilderness with nothing but your wits. Would you be able to survive the harshness of the cold? A lot of survival resources gloss over what you do in cold environs. My guest today is Dave Hall, and he's written a book about just that, called Winter In the Wilderness. We talk about shelter, how to get water, building a fire, surviving hypothermia, and more.

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If you enjoy shows like The Wire or True Detective, or film noir, there's one guy you can thank for that: Dashiell Hammett. He was a writer in the 1920s-1940s, and he is the guy who created the modern detective. He took the entire genre into the modern era. And Hammett was able to do this because he was in fact a detective for the Pinkerton agency before becoming a writer. My guest today, Nathan Ward, has written a book called The Lost Detective: Becoming Dashiell Hammett. We discuss how Hammett's experience paved the way for the modern American detective in entertainment.

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More and more today, we're communicating with the people in our lives through screens. While this has greatly improved efficiency, there are some drawbacks that have come with the decline in face-to-face conversation. My guest today, Sherry Turkle, has written a book (Reclaiming Conversation) about what we're missing when we don't engage with people in face-to-face conversation. In today's show we talk about what we can do to reclaim conversation with the people in our lives, and there are a lot of actionable tips that you can implement right away.

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Matt Reynolds, a former power lifter and Strong Man competitor, is the co-owner of a gym in Springfield, MO called Strong Gym. He's been coaching me online, and I've seen significant improvement in my lifting and strength training since I've started with him. I wanted to get him on the podcast to talk about his story, as well as why everyone should be doing strength and barbell training.

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In the last few years we've seen an interesting phenomenon, especially on college campuses, where students will take slights or even just awkwardness incredibly sensitively and emotionally. Two sociologists have gotten together -- Bradley Campbell and Jason Manning -- and published a paper and theory about why this "victimhood" culture has arisen on campuses. We talk about this paper, as well as honor, dignity, masculinity, and more.

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Lewis Howes had aspirations of being a pro football player, and he was on the path to making it happen for himself. After a career-ending injury, and year spent on his sister's couch, he started an online business which became a big success. Since then, he's started a podcast called The School of Greatness, in which he interviews people about what it means to live a flourishing life. He has a new book by the same name, and on today's show Lewis and I talk about how to live the good life.

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We've talked about Stoicism before on the Art of Manliness. From eminent men like Seneca and Marcus Aurelius, the Romans heartily embraced the philosophy. My guest today wrote a book about how Stoicism can help our modern soldiers. Nancy Sherman is a professor of philosophy at Georgetown, and on today's show we talk about healing not only physical wounds, but mental ones too with this ancient way of thinking.

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One of my favorite writers is Adam Makos. He has a new book out called Devotion. It's about two men -- one black and one white -- who end up in the Korean War together and become fast friends. In this podcast, Adam and I talk about these two men, as well as why he thinks it's important to continue telling the stories of our war veterans.

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Kyle Eschenroeder is an entrepreneur who runs Startupbros.com. Beyond that, he's a guy who reads and thinks deeply, and has contributed a few excellent pieces of content for AoM. In this podcast we talk about one of those popular articles, which was about thriving in uncertainty. We tend to think we have more control over our lives than we really do. So today we talk about tools and techniques to truly thrive when life takes us in unexpected directions.

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Have you ever noticed that when you try really hard at something, you actually aren't able to achieve what you're trying to do? For example, if you can't sleep at night, you try really hard to fall asleep, which only makes matters worse. Chinese philosophers understood this fact that when you try really hard, it makes things harder to achieve. My guest today, Edward Slingerland, has written a book called Trying Not to Try, which combines these Chinese philosophies with modern neuroscience and explores how we can live a more carefree and spontaneous life.

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Talent is undoubtedly an important part of being successful in life. But there's another piece that's often overlooked: our mindset. My guest today, Carol Dweck, has spent decades researching this very topic. Her conclusion is that there are basically two mindsets in life: growth or fixed. Whichever one you have will go a long ways towards determining your success in life, as well as your children.

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Every guy at one point or another in his life dreams about being Jason Bourne or James Bond. Lock picking, escaping restraints, evading bad guys, killing bad dudes with an improvised weapon. That's stuff guys like to know even if they'll never have to use it. Well, now you can learn how to do all that cool spy stuff. Navy SEAL Clint Emerson has just published a book called 100 Deadly Skills: The SEAL Operative's Guide to Eluding Pursuers, Evading Capture, and Surviving Any Dangerous Situation. In it, you'll find every cool Jason Bourne skill you'd ever want to know. Today on the podcast, Clint and I discuss the EDC you should have to be prepared, the workout you should do to be a tactical athlete, and skill sets you should acquire to keep you and your loved ones safe. You don't want to miss this one!

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In the last decade or so, books, blogs, corporations, and even governments are putting more emphasis on the idea of happiness. On the surface, this sounds great, but our guest today argues that maybe this should give us some pause. William Davies is the author of The Happiness Industry, and makes the case that this focus on happiness may be more about dollar signs than our actual well-being.

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Believe it or not, we're coming up on the 20th anniversary of the movie Braveheart. It's a film that fills you with thumos and inspires you. On today's episode, I talk with the man who created the William Wallace we know from that movie. His name is Randall Wallace, a screenwriter, produce, songwriter, and author. His new book is called Living the Braveheart Life: Finding the Courage to Follow Your Heart.

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You've heard of the Oregon Trail. You learned about it in elementary or middle school, quite possibly by playing the popular computer game. Despite it being one of largest land migrations in human history, though, you probably don't know a whole lot about the Oregon Trail. Today's guest decided to remedy that by actually crossing the entirety of the trail in a covered wagon and with a team of mules. It's a fascinating conversation that you won't want to miss.

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Despite romantic relationships being such a big part of our lives, nobody ever really sits you down and says, "Here's how to have a successful relationship." We're instead expected to figure it out on our own. Today's guest, Geoffrey Miller, says we're setting people up for failure by not giving them some advice. On the show we discuss the book he co-wrote with Tucker Max called "Mate."

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When I was a kid, one of my heroes was Harry Houdini. Among his many feats, he could hold his breath for an incredibly long time. I was intrigued by the topic, so I started researching and found the book Deep by James Nestor. It's about the sport and science of freediving, which involves taking one deep breath and diving hundreds of feet under water. From how human bodies react to being under water, to tips about holding your breath longer, this is a fascinating podcast that you don't want to miss.

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It's often said "time is money," but do you really treat your time like money? Well, my guest today on the podcast says, no, most people don't, but if they did they'd be much wiser stewards of their time. Her name is Elizabeth Grace Saunders and she's the author of the book "Invest Your Time Like Money" and today on the podcast we discuss what you can do today so you get out of "time debt" and invest time so you have more of it in the future. If you're feeling busy and overwhelmed, this podcast is for you.

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The very first article I published on The Art of Manliness was How to Shave Like Your Grandpa where I explained how to get started with safety razor shaving. Lots of guys learned about old-school shaving from that article, but there is one man who has brought more men into the fold of safety razor shaving than that article. His name is Mark Herro, but he’s better known as Mantic59. Through his YouTube videos, Mark has become “Dad of the Internet” by teaching millions of men how to shave. Besides his popular YouTube channel, Mark runs the shaving blog Sharpologist. Today on the podcast, Mark and I discuss the ins and outs of old school wet shaving and the secrets of getting a close comfortable shave.

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We've probably all seen instances where dumb rules and regulations were enforced even when everyone involved understood they were enforcing dumb rules and regulations. We've created so many rules that we no longer know how to use common sense to guide us. At least that's the argument my guest on today's podcast makes in his book Practical Wisdom. Barry Schwartz is a professor of psychology at Swathmore College. In his book, Practical Wisdom, Schwartz highlights how our society has been overtaken by rules and regulation leaving people very little room to exercise their discretion. This overreliane on rules can have disasterous consequences. Instead of rules, Schwartz argues that we need to revive the ancient Greek concept of phronesis, or practical wisdom. Today in the podcast, we discuss how to do just that.

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It’s a question that philosophers have taken on since Aristotle.
What makes something funny?
Going beyond that– why do we laugh in the first place? Because if you step back and look at it, laughing is pretty dang weird.
Well, my guest today on the podcast went on a world wide tour to uncover the science of humor. His name is Peter McGraw. He’s a behavioral scientist at the University of Colorado in Boulder and he’s the co-author of the book The Humor Code: A Global Search for What Makes Things Funny. Today on the podcast Peter and I discuss the findings from his research around the world as well as in his humor lab at the University of Colorado. If you’re looking to add a bit more humor into your life, you won’t want to miss this.

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During the past 10 years or so, there's been an uptick in the number of books and newspaper articles about how young men today our floundering. Fewer young men are going to college than in years past, and those that do go, fewer of them are graduating. What's more there's a general sense that young men today are simply unmotivated to seek out gainful employment or starting families. Meanwhile, girls and young women are surpassing boys and young men in education and in work.
My guest today on the podcast has spent his career studying how the biological differences between boys and girls and the changes in our culture and society during the past few decades can explain these discrpencies in achievement. His name is Dr. Leonard Sax and he's the author of several books including Boy's Adrift and Girls on the Edge. Today on the podcast, Dr. Sax and I discuss how gender effects the emotional and intellectual development of boys and girls and what parents and schools can do to help them thrive based on their unique attributes. If you're a parent, you won't want to miss this episode.

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“Discovering your authentic self” has become an article of faith in the United States. There are thousands of blogs, books, and seminars that supposedly teach people how to discover who they really are. But what if our obsession to uncover an authentic self is getting in the way of living a truly flourishing life? What if instead of trying to discover an authentic life, we should be focused on inventing an authentic life? Well, that’s the argument Eric Wilson makes in his book Keep it Fake: Inventing an Authentic Life. Today on the podcast, Eric and I discuss questions of the self that have boggled philosophers for ages and how thinking ourselves as authors of our life story can help us lead a truly flourishing and nurturing life.

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Since 9/11 and before, American warriors have faced combat in difficult and adverse theaters with dedication, courage, and remarkable inner fortitude. Our nation supports them during their time in the fight, and "thank you for your service" has become a common civilian affirmation.
But what happens when these men and women return from the battlefield? What is waiting for them at home? How does our society prepare these indispensable citizens for the confusion, absurdity, and trauma of their transition back to everyday life?
Marine combat veteran David J. Danelo's message is simple--those who return to peace after war possess a power that must be discovered, honored, and treasured. The Return: A Field Manual for Life After Combat tells how our military and civilian cultures can protect and nurture this potent gift.
Today on the podcast, we discuss how warriors can make the return to civilian life and what civilians can do to help.

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What would you say to a person who told you that you could retire at age 30, never have to work again, and still live a comfortable life, all on a normal salary and without winning the lottery?
You’d probably call them crazy. Of course that’s not how money works.
Well, my guest today did retire at age 30, and he did so without making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year. And through his blog, he’s helped other people reach “financial independence” a lot sooner than they thought possible by living a life of “financial badassery.” His name is Pete and he’s the owner of the website Mr. Money Mustache. In today’s podcast, Pete and I discuss how living Teddy Roosevelt’s “Strenuous Life” can help you become financially independent.

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Something all men have in common is that one point in their lives they're all bachelors, that is, they've never been married. What's interesting is that there's been very little written about the history and sociology of bachelorhood. Well, my guest today is the author of one of the few books on the topic. His name is Howard Chudacoff and he's the author of the book, The Age of the Bacehlor. Dr. Chudacoff and I discuss the influence bachelors in America have had on American masculinity, particularly the bachelors who lived during the late 19th century or "Golden Age of Bachelorhood." It was during this time that bars, barbershops, and pool halls became masculine institutions and the traditionally male past times like sports rose in prominence in the U.S.

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Our personal tech devices can be both a blessing and a curse. All the information we'd ever want is right at our fingertips, yet at the same time these devices can make us feel rushed and pressed for time while discouraging deep thinking.
Well, my guest today argues that to learn how to navigate our techno-world, we should look to the insights of ancient philosophers and thinkers. William Powers is the author of Hamlet's Blackberry and today on the podcast we discuss what Shakespeare, Seneca, and Socrates can teach us about making better use of our technologies.

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My guest today wrote a parable about a young boat captain that provides timeless advice on developing the traits needed for lasting and significant success in your life. His name is Alden Mills, he's a former Navy SEAL, inventor of the Perfect Pushup, and the author of Be Unstoppable: The Eight Essential Actions to Succeed at Anything. In today's podcast, Alden and I discuss perseverance, grit, and becoming the master and commander of your life.

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Today I talk to champion gun shooter, Mike Seeklander about the world of competition gun shooting. Besides competing around the country, Mike is also a firearms instructor for citizens as well as law enforcement officers. Today on the show, Mike and I discuss the world of competition gun shooting-- what's involved and how to get started. We also discuss self-defense with and without a firearm.

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