Sunday Papers

Happy Mother’s Day! Billy Crystal weighs in on cancel culture and Elon Musk hosts SNL. McGregor gives Mayweather a head slap and Tom Brady gets a $6M boat. How did he afford it? He only got $2M from the PPP Loan program. 

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We crush on the Winklevoss twins and have a beautiful guest play the birthday game and ask out Mike. Brought to you by http://Audible.com/Papers and http://HelloFresh.com/Papers12

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Greg Zooms in from the City of Brotherly Love while Mike sits in his closet hoping his daughter doesn’t hear him roasting Caitlyn Jenner. A listener joins us to play “Guess Your Birthday” and Chris Denman has the shits.

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An extended length podcast where Greg admits to coming around on Khruangbin and we describe a Florida man jumping a drawbridge in a mini-van. Listener contest announced for next week!

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It’s Mike’s birthday and he celebrates by sitting alone in a closet and laughing at a man (not in FLA!) who molested an Elmo doll. NSFW. May not be safe for home either.

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The Girl Scouts take a beating this week, our horoscope tells us to buy a Porsche on credit and we have a new rule about who is allowed to wear a thong to the beach.

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Looking for more on Woody vs Mia? Not going to find it here! Instead we double up on Florida Man, shit on the Queen and pay our respects to the great Marvelous Marvin Hagler.

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Thanks to our sponsor, Audible (http://audible.com/papers). Episode 53. Wanna hear 2 middle aged white guys defend Woody Allen and Dr. Seuss? We're here for you! Also, the existential debate over what you would do if you found 70 lbs of cocaine on the beach.

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Thanks to our sponsor, Audible (http://audible.com/papers). Episode 52. Relax, America: Gaga got her kidnapped dogs back, no one was injured when a Florida man threw an alligator into a Wendy’s drive-through and, according to Gibbons, Woody did NOTHING wrong.

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This week Mike defends Woody Allen and our producer Chris defends Qanon. In Fla two people dress as old women to get vaccinated and the new sex robots are here that come complete with bad attitudes.

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Mike is livid about the GameStop stock scandal. Greg’s not happy about Polish abortions. Both are a little disappointed in this week's Family Circus.

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While other news sources focus on the Inauguration, Sunday Papers takes a hard look at UGGS for dogs, a happy ending for a wife in Turks and Caicos and Lil Wayne’s pardon from Trump.

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Big political week? Not on Sunday Papers! We give you a rest and focus on missing Bitcoins, penis cages and what a single mother of 3 can expect to make posting nude pix on the internet.

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Mike snaps out of his Christmas hangover to talk to Greg about a Santa stuck in power lines, a father-son double murder and frozen Iguanas falling from the trees in FL.

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Man sues parents for tossing out his porn collection, Florida Man dies of COVID ON a flight out of Orlando & the Bee Gees Doc is off the charts. 

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Patriots owner Robert Kraft is off scot-free but the masseuse owes $30k in fines to the court. He’s worth $6B. Adolph Hitler wins an election in Africa and Carole Baskin is this week’s “Florida Man”!

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It’s a party! Cher saves an elephant and the Taiwanese parliament is hurling pig intestines at each other. Dagwood sucks...

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Florida Man this week is a guy sitting in the front row of Greg’s show in Tampa. Mike is out of toilet paper and WTF is running down Rudy’s face?

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Consenting sex robots, a very hands on Florida theme park, and "Baby Fae" is remembered - Joanne writes in, still has a crush. 

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New president- same Sunday Papers! Magic mushrooms and Exorcism in Portland and, as always, Florida Man comes through big.

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Costco fires the Thai monkeys that were picking their coconuts, Lori Loughlin goes directly to jail, and maybe a little about the election.

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Our first guest contributor Andy Kindler does an op/ed piece and Mike shares about his first time (alone).

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From Jackson Hole, Mike joins Greg for a roundup of town halls, ancient Italian porn and, of course, the Sunday funnies.

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Greg is in Cleveland and Mike is in Zion National Park in Utah. But the paper still gets delivered! Little bit of Trump in the news.

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New Sunday Papers.  Covid in Chief, South Park, Florida Men and oddly a bunch of talk about milk: almond, oat and breasteses.

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This week: all the biggest headlines: Refurbished Vietnamese condoms and new 9-11 conspiracy theories.

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New Sunday Papers. Van Morrison won’t be on The Masked Singer, Joe Rogan runs Presidential debate and RIP RBG. 

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The eighth and maybe final Thursday Papers. Listener emails, This Day in History and an alcoholic's letter to Dear Abby that reminds Greg he’s going to start drinking again.

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Fires rage in the west and an insane man fathers 36 children with sperm donations. Family Circus literally makes no sense this week.

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More listener corrections and "this day in history." Who wants to run a factory? Jelly Belly Jelly Beans is pulling a Willy Wonka. Plus, Mike gives an update on Sturgis. 

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Greg and Mike manage to deliver a tiger-focused story more outrageous than the latest Carole Baskin news. Mike shows continued support for the south, and we find out Greg's not so great with fax numbers. 

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More listener emails and an ad for great lobster. Plus, Mike reviews the VMAs and reads reviews for "Hoops" on Netflix. 

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From Catalina Island CA, Mike and Greg record from a campground. There are children around which does not stop them from riffing on three-ways and magic mushrooms.

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Listeners have more corrections, Greg and Mike review Netflix's "Love on the Spectrum," and Judd Apatow inadvertently calls in.

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California is on fire, Greg and Mike return to Sturgis, and Netflix apologizes. It's also revealed the show may not be suitable for hospital listening. 

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Greg and Mike give an update on the old biker accident reports from Sturgis: no masks, no helmets, no insurance. Also, your mail and a tough crossword puzzle that even stumps them.

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Update from The biker rally in S Dakota and Mike gets attacked in “Letters to the editor”.

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Greg and Mike detail the craziest tripping story and apologize to Danny Kaye’s family.

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In an episode where we apologize to one group it is entirely possible that we offended 2 others. Our first Rap theme song!

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It’s mid-week and the #Ellen controversy is still in the headlines. Turns out the show was pretty edgy.

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Greg and Mike continue to NOT violate their Non Disclosure Agreements from working on Ellen but they do give advice on how to be a good roommate. Do not do what the guy in CT did; chop your roommates head off with a sword.

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Welcome to the FIRST EPISODE of #ThursdayPapers. A 20-minute companion piece to #SundayPapers that goes deeper into the shallowest stories in the news.

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Big news week! Fauci’s first pitch and Trader Joe’s avoiding getting cancelled by Whole Foods. Also, Dagwood almost throws a move on Blondie.

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