TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

Luke and Andrew discover an old planning sheet from the news/talk radio show they worked on in 2011. They also discuss a creepy device used in China to prevent toilet paper theft. And they receive their first "fake" phone call from a listener.

Luke has been experimenting with some ASMR recordings. Andrew has been laughing at jokes he doesn't understand. And they've both been listening to the somewhat questionable podcast about Richard Simmons. They discuss these things and offer some Music For Your Weekend!

Luke and Andrew have differing views on an anti-Trump tweet posted on McDonald's corporate timeline. And it turns out they have something very important in common with Julian Assange.

Andrew doubles down on his latest pop culture theory, even though he's not getting any support. He and Luke discuss Rachel Maddow's Tweet Heard 'Round The Liberal World and a recent follow-up interview with the "BBC Dad."

Andrew finally confronts Luke about an element of the show that's been bothering him. Also, a headline about the Goodyear blimp leads to a conversation about Cialis commercials, and a story about wine budgets leads to a conversation about "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas."

Luke and Andrew discuss the last time they each had a good cry. We also learn that Andrew is much dumber than a 5-year-old spelling bee contestant.

When people have problems, they turn to TBTL. In today's O.P.P. ("Other People's Problems") segment, Luke and Andrew tackle vacation divorce disasters and found-money frustrations. Plus, Music For Your Weekend!

Luke and Andrew break the world record for inside jokes about public radio legal IDs and mix-minus problems. They also discuss Disney's new batch of live-action adaptions like Beauty and the Beast. And they travel back to 2009 to relive the final radio broadcast of TBTL.

Luke is dealing with a new piece of cat furniture in his home. Plus, some movie theaters are building play areas for kids -- right in the auditorium where the films are shown. Also, either Andrew is going insane, or Luke is gaslighting him with audio drops.

Luke and Andrew discuss baseball cards, Alec Baldwin's decision to stop impersonating Trump on SNL, and whether our televisions are spying on us.

Luke spent the weekend wrestling with computer passwords, while Andrew probably got scammed by his cellphone company. In other words, they are officially middle-aged grumps. They also discuss a fascinating legal case involving Snuggies and international trade law. And they pit Jimmy Buffett against Harley-Davidson, for some reason.

Luke explains why his dog owns diapers that she never uses. Andrew is having an emotional breakdown over a broken cell phone. And, of course, there's Music For Your Weekend!

Luke joins Andrew at the studios of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat to discuss Luke's appearance on a local morning TV show. Plus, Andrew somehow becomes Luke's imaginary publicist, and they discuss the science behind cat tongues. It's fascinating stuff.

Luke and Andrew discuss why food tastes different on airplanes. (Turns out, SCIENCE is involved!) They also come up with some new, fun baseball rules involving water balloons.

Donald Trump's preferred way of eating steak has everyone hopping mad. Luke and Andrew discuss the extremely personal world of condiment politics. Plus, Luke is obsessed with some new TV shows, podcasts, and documentaries that he wants you to watch. And Andrew's new idea for improving the show is a bust.

Andrew learned a dirty little secret about a regional chain restaurant on Saturday. Meanwhile, Luke and Carey spent their weekend writing, producing and performing in Trump-related comedy sketches. Plus, the biggest mistake ever to occur on an Oscar stage made for some great Academy Awards entertainment. And Andrew gets rejected by Twitter.

Luke and Andrew are gearing up for the weekend. Luke's involves soup and hosting a fancy event. Andrew's involves a chain restaurant in Tuckwila. They also discuss the new, stark reality of "economy" airline flights and why it's okay to sit by the airplane bathroom. Plus, Music For Your Weekend!

Luke joins the show from Portland, as he prepares for an evening of high-pressure live radio. Andrew is (per)fuming mad at the LAX redesign. They discuss these issues, plus an update on the bizarre Kim Jong-nam assassination and a story about a cheating marathon runner who was foiled by her own fitness tracker.

Luke and Andrew discuss the fine line between being friendly and being overly-friendly, especially when it comes to talking with cashiers and waitresses. Plus, a stolen super bowl jersey leads to a confession from Luke, and a failed experiment by Henry Ford gets Andrew riled up.

Luke realizes he is addicted to internet shopping. Andrew has a belabored theory about this. Plus, a soccer betting scandal in the U.K. involves a goalie eating pie. And is it okay to brush your teeth in a public restroom?

Andrew asks Luke if his friends did the right thing after finding a bunch of money under a pool table this weekend. Plus, Snapchat glasses are going to be available online soon, and Luke introduces a new segment called "HACK ATTACK!", which will undoubtedly improve your life in almost every way. Special thanks to Chad Darnell of Portland, OR, and Nancy Cook of Burien, WA, for supporting today's show!

Luke is stuck in Portland, where he bought Andrew a special gift. He lets Andrew ask 20 questions to guess what it is. They also discuss the unbelievable details of an international assassination and how Columbia University utterly destroyed the emotions of some 200 would-be students. Also, there's a lot of Luke impersonating Michael McDonald.

Luke swings by the offices of Walsh, Walsh & Doormat on his way to Portland...if he makes it to Portland. He and Andrew discuss cat wine, Monopoly, and your dreams. That's right: Dream Court is back.

Luke and Andrew find joy in an old viral video, then they discuss whether or not someone should take away Harrison Ford's pilots license. Also, why Stephen Colbert is finally finding success on CBS, and whether Meatloaf really knows what he wouldn't do for love.

Luke tries to help Andrew "Heart of Stone" Walsh get through Valentines Day. They also discuss the retro cell phone craze and why Luke is getting a second phone. Also, the milk industry wants you to remind you that their product is "lacteal secretion" - accept no substitutes.

Andrew is back from Costa Rica, where he did his best not to fight with a racist in a hot tub. He and Luke discuss that, and whether or not Andrew's driving teacher was trying to seduce him when he was 17. Plus, Adele stops mid-song at the Grammys, and Broadway has a toilet problem.

Camaro Kev from "Stack of Dimes" stops by to chat about Luke's new favorite insult (which started out on a "Tragically Hip" newsgroup in the early 2000's), Scientology, and what he would do if he was "Hunted". Special thanks today to Heather Schwampe of Seattle and Kevin Shafer of Florence, CO for helping make today's show possible!

TBTL Engineer Emeritus Sean DeTore swings by to talk auto repair, male dancing, and the use of flute in rap music backing tracks.

Luke takes to the very very frozen streets of Bellingham and almost crashes multiple times while sneaking into a Gym and visiting an IRS office right out of a movie.

Alex Falcone stops by to talk about his new book "Unwrap My Heart" (the story of a girl who falls in love with a mummy) and also the Amazing World of Frogs, plus, why Sean Spicer's "Venmo" account is troubling. Special thanks to John Stedman of San Diego CA & Elizabeth VanStee of Clawson MI for helping make today's show possible!

Andrew heads to Costa Rica just ahead of an arctic storm, leaving Luke, Carey, Poddog and The Bay Kitty trapped in the snow. Cabin Fever sets in and talk turns to Luke's Biological Father, why Carey doesn't like being on the show, and if there are any more Little Burbanks in the future.

Luke and Andrew say goodbye before Andrew heads off to a vacation resort that he's 99% sure isn't a swingers' club. They also discuss why they don't like action scenes in movies, unless the movies are Die Hard, Star Wars or Mad Max. Plus, why some hotel thermostats purposely don't work. And, Music For Your Weekend!

Luke joins the show from Chicago, after jumping through hoops to make his first-class flight out of Seattle. He and Andrew talk about that adventure. They also talk about Super Bowl commercials, criminal exploits in movie theaters, and whether they should change the name of the show.

Luke joins Andrew in Wallingford to discuss convenience stores, Yelp reviews, and why Luke almost had to save a man's life at a Shoreline casino last night. Also, a man is arrested for running around the Microsoft campus naked.

Stu "The StuBot" Neuman joins the show on his final day at American Public Media. He has only one request as a parting gift, but can Luke and Andrew deliver? Plus, why kids don't ride bikes anymore and why Luke's not afraid of bobcats anymore. Oh, and there's egg talk. Lots of egg talk.

Luke joins the show from just outside a hot tub in Florida. He and Andrew address Tweets from listeners. Topics include power zoodling, stolen sports teams, and why Friday's episode made people squirm. Special thanks to Caitlin Anderson-Patterson and Colleen Arnold for supporting today's show

Ira Glass joins the show to answer the age old question: Does he remember who we are? He also talks about producing This American Life during the Trump era and what he's feeding his dog these days.

Luke joins Andrew at the offices of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat to discuss his evening of blasting Binaca and how it's like vaping. They also obsess over Michael Dukakis' obsession with turkey carcasses.

Luke visits the studios of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat to discuss Andrew's current situation with his neighbors and the history of EGOTs.

Luke and Andrew discuss their complicated relationships with soda pop. Plus, Andrew has a new, surprising hobby. And they try to solve a listener's "A-Ha" problem.Huge thanks to Stephanie Pederson and Benjamin Peven for supporting today's show!

Luke and Andrew discuss cooking shows, Netflix's mysterious new TV series, and the White House press secretary's war on Dippin' Dots.

Luke and Carey hop in the car and head north to Canada to escape today's inauguration news. Andrew joins them from Wallingford, where he tries to talk them through border security.

Luke and Andrew discuss their plans for inauguration day. One plan involves border security. The other involves eggnog. Plus, "fix-it cafes" are popping-up around the country. And Japanese bidet manufacturers have decided to create a universal bidet language. Special thanks to Brian Joyce and Jacqueline Justice for supporting today's episode!

Luke has two very different experiences with two different laser doctors. Andrew is in love with the rain in Seattle. And John from Arkansas has an interesting encounter in a gas station parking lot.

Luke and Andrew discuss a "robot" lawyer helping people get out of parking tickets, why Rob Schneider is more complicated than you think, and why Andrew is reliving the French Revolution.Special thanks to Aisha Leapley and Suraj Adhikary for supporting today's episode!

Luke wonders why so many babies have glasses these days. Andrew reaches office-supply nirvana. They discuss these important issues, as well as a comedy night for the history books that took place in NYC last week. And they say goodbye to the Seahawks with the final No Point Conversion of the season. Special thanks to Bill Coats and Matthew Laninga for supporting today's episode.

Luke met Tom Hanks last night. But did he get a photo with him? The answer might surprise you.

Luke is in Chicago, where his plan to take a photo with David S. Pumpkins has hit a snag. Andrew's attempts to make Google+ a thing are going south. And we learn that Norway has celebrity radio listeners.

Luke and Andrew discuss the worst cartoon characters in commercials, Luke's new "intermittent fasting" diet, and Andrew's 100-step process to cleaning a bathroom. Plus, why a woman in Brazil has been praying to a Lord of the Rings action figure for years.

Andrew is having a bad-technology day, and it is affecting his TBTL performance. He and Luke discuss changes to the Monopoly board game and why Hacksaw Jim Duggan doesn't carry a hacksaw.